I ate a lot this weekend. A. Lot. Cheese was involved. Cheese that actually looks like a custard filled donut is my new favorite. My aunt bought a really expensive block of that kind of cheese for a family cookout and I literally ate 3/4 of it on my own. I wish i was kidding with you all. With crackers. And tortilla chips. And pasta salad. And angel food cake. Definitely a lot of paleo things at our cookout.
I went to the North Market with my aunts over the weekend which is this massive market in Columbus with every kind of amazing food you could ever want. I always tell people that my dream is to go there one day and just eat one of everything from each booth. One day it will happen. And I will waddle out of there with a massive food baby growing inside of me. Anyways, parking down there is not fun and there was a lot of traffic flowing into one particular parking garage. We were waiting our turn to get in when all of a sudden we see this lady cop come out of nowhere and start screaming at the elderly couple in the car behind us to “HUMP THE CENTER LINE!” And when I say scream I mean yelling at the top of her lungs like there was some kind of emergency. There was no emergency. There were also jumping movements that occurred with the yelling that are too graphic to describe here. That poor, poor elderly couple. Their faces depicted pure horror. We still aren’t sure what the hell “hump the center line” really means in cop lingo, but that lady cop did provide us some great entertainment that afternoon.
You wanna know what blows? When you get really excited about checking out a bike path near your house and you ride up to that bike path only to find that it’s actually just a really long driveway leading up to someone’s house, and not actually a bike path at all. Yeah. That happened. Talk about a freaking disappointment.
I posted a picture of these cinnamon rolls on Instagram yesterday and people lost their sh*t. In a good way. It’s because they look super naughty. People just love looking at naughty food. They can’t help it. It’s human nature. I am one of those people. I think that’s why I like Juli from PaleOMG so darn much. She is a naughty food lover. And so is Vanessa from Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind. The name of her blog is pretty much a giveaway. I just love those two ladies.
I think that’s also why i like Whole Me so much. They are a grain-free food company that makes delicious snacks for us paleo people. You guys may have seen me post about their stuff on Instagram and Facebook recently. If you haven’t checked them out…go NOW! Their Date Me bar is my absolute favorite. It tasted naughty but it wasn’t. It was anything but naughty. There were definitely only good things in there. And their Eat Me “cereal” is to die for. I put that stuff on EVERYTHING. When I wasn’t eating it straight out of the bag of course. I kid you not, my hand did not come out of that bag for a good hour when it first arrived. I used to love me a nice bowl of crunchy cereal with some cold milk before I found paleo. I mean come on. Who doesn’t love cereal. Anyone who says they don’t is a liar. I was absolutely ecstatic to try this stuff. And it did not disappoint. It’s delicious and fills my cereal void when I need a crunchy snack fix. They also have a Wake Me bar, which has a coffee flavor. All around amazeballs stuff you guys. Basically what I’m saying is you need it. Right now.
I’ve been waiting a REALLY long time for this day. And by that I mean I’ve been waiting a really long time for it to be September so I could post a pumpkin recipe. I am a full on fall lover. I actually don’t really enjoy summer all that much. Unheard of, I know. But when you sweat like me, summer isn’t really your favorite. Fall is much better. Cool temps, leaves changing, and pumpkin pumpkin pumpkin. Pumpkin all the things is my motto in fall. If they make it in pumpkin flavor, I want the crap out of it. So I hope you are like me in the pumpkin category and will love these pumpkin cinnie rolls. And if you’re not a pumpkin lovah, well first off you’re effing nuts, but you can make these cinnie rolls. I’ll stop calling them that now.
- For the crust:
- 2 1/2 cups almond flour
- 1/2 cup coconut flour
- 2 tbsp coconut crystals
- 1/2 tbsp cinnamon
- 1/2 tsp sea salt
- 1/4 tsp baking soda
- 1/3 cup pumpkin
- 4 tbsp grass-fed butter, melted
- 2 eggs
- 2 tbsp honey
- 1 tsp vanilla
- 1/2 cup honey
- 2 tbsp grass-fed butter, melted
- 1 tbsp almond butter
- 1 tbsp cinnamon
- For the frosting:
- 1/2 cup honey
- 1/2 cup coconut butter, melted
- Pre-heat oven to 350.
- In a medium sized bowl, combine almond flour, coconut flour, coconut crystals, cinnamon, salt, and baking soda. Set aside.
- In a stand mixer (or other separate bowl), combine pumpkin, butter, eggs, honey, and vanilla until all ingredients are well incorporated.
- Slowly add the dry ingredients to the wet, until a thick dough is formed.
- Place dough in the refrigerator while you prepare the filling.
- In a small bowl, combine all filling ingredients until everything is well incorporated.
- Remove dough from refrigerator and place on a piece of parchment paper sprinkled with a little almond flour.
- Sprinkle more almond flour on top, then cover with another piece of parchment paper.
- Roll out dough into a rectangle shape, about 1/2 inch thick.
- Spread filling all over dough using the back of a spoon.
- Starting with a short end, roll dough into a log. (WARNING: This part is not super easy. I found it helpful to cut the rectangle in half longways, and roll one of the pieces at a time. I also found it helpful to use a spatula, putting it under the dough to help keep flipping it as you go. Don’t worry if the dough “breaks” or “cracks” during this step. Just form it back together with your hands as you go).
- Cut logs into 2 inch pieces (I got about 12).
- Place on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper.
- Bake for 15-20 minutes, keeping an eye on them so they don’t burn!
- While they are baking, prepare the frosting by mixing together honey and coconut butter.
- Remove rolls from oven and top with frosting.